Emotional time of year.

I'm sitting here watching my 15 month old grandson listen to Veggie Tales and dance along with the belly button song and thinking about the difference in our house from this time last year. This time last year we were concerned about how we were going to juggle bringing my father-in-law home and work at the same time. We were concerned about Jay'von's health (he suffered obstructive apnea caused from severe reflux) and what we would need to do with him when Courtney started nursing school or a job. He really could not be in daycare. There were a lot of questions and uncertainties.

Now here we are. The questions are all answered. I decided to quit work to take care of Dad. God took Dad home to heaven on March 30. Courtney started nursing school in June, and I decided to continue to stay home and take care of Javy. It has been such a blessing.

But at this time of year (the last months we spent with Dad) I can't help but remember those last days and all the joys and sorrows we went through.

I have decided to focus on the good times we had with him. He was such a cheerful person and so funny, even on some of the days when he didn't know anything. It was always fun to ask him every day what color his room was. In his imagination there were people in there painting his room all the time and it was always a different color. He told me they would do it any color I wanted. I wish it were that easy. It still needs the border done.

I think of him a lot on days like this when it is dreary. He had problems with his vision that made it difficult to see when the sun was shining. Everything looked hazy then. But on dreary days he could see clearly. So when the sun was shining he said it was foggy and when it was dreary and foggy he said it was such a clear day. People that did not know thought he was crazy. But we knew what was going on. Still on dreary days one of us will usually say "Isn't it a clear day."

I'm glad we had him right here with us for 5 years. It was such a blessing. And I'm glad we still have Jay'von with us for a while. He also is such a blessing.

I guess that is what life is all about. Making memories. Some of them good and some of them not so good. We just have to decide which of them we are going to focus on. I need to remember that this time of year I need to focus on the good times and good memories from last year. There are many of them and they outweigh the bad.