SPRING THOUGHTS!

Well, we have made it through a very hard winter. You would all have to agree that it is one of the worst winters we have had in many, many years. It is amazing how the weather has dominated our lives. Weather has always been a conversation starter but this year it has sometimes been the whole conversation. You talk about everything from how many days you were stuck in the house to how many "feet" of snow is on the ground and how many days we have gone without seeing the "ground". No one should be without food for thought or conversation.

I am one of the fortunate ones that did not have to go out and brave the elements to go to work every day. I am thankful for that. The older I get the more of a home body I become. It has now been 2 years since I was a member of the working class. That is actually what the substance of this blog will be about today.

I was a stay at home Mom. My Mom was a stay at home Mom. I believe in women being stay at home Moms. I did not choose to work until my youngest was in school and then for the first five years worked at the school. So I worked when they were in school and had off when they had off. It was a wonderful job. I loved the situation because my kids were still young enough that they would need a sitter or (the dreaded word) "daycare".

I am now a "stay at home Nona". I have chosen this for my life right now and it fits. I love being able to help Courtney since she does not have the option of being a stay at home Mom. But this winter I have had the opportunity to feel stereotyped as I never did when I was home with my kids. I'll say a little more about this after I tell you my story.

The company that Charlie works for now has an appreciation dinner for all it's bosses in January. It was a very nice evening. A nice restaurant and everyone was very "nice". But this "stay at home Nona" felt like a fish out of water. You know how it is at a gathering like that. You are at a table full of people that you don't know and everyone tends to ask questions and find out a little bit about each other. One of the ladies that works in the office for this company asked me if I had to work that day or had I been off. I very politely said I don't work outside the home and immediately felt a hush and about 3 or 4 sets of eyes on me like I was a freak. Charlie had left the table for a moment so I was alone and really felt "alone". Her response was just "Oh!". And for the first time in my life I felt inferior because I choose to not have a "job". I wanted to stand up and shout "I am a certified medical coder. I worked at a hospital for 10 years. If you give me a medical record, I can read it and understand it. I am not a dummy because I do not go to work everyday."

I really had a strange evening after that. I don't remember ever having that feeling when I stayed at home with my kids. I believe there are a couple of reasons for that. The first would be that at that time I did not have a trade. I had office training when I was in school and the only job I had was in classified at the newspaper. Then I started having children and did not work. No problem, that was my life. The second being that I really didn't get out much to places where I would encounter people like that. I really was a different person. More quiet and my kids were my life.

I have now had the the opportunity to live the "other" life. Yes, I did it when my kids were older and able to take care of themselves but I did it non-the-less. I had a job that fulfilled me (at the time). I actually became more confident about myself and able to go out into the world with confidence that I am a person of value. I am a contributing citizen. Lah Te Dah!!

Since that night in January I have had a lot of time to think about this situation. Do you want to know what I have decided? No, I have not decided to send out my resume and get back into the work force. Actually I really don't care if I never have to enter that rat race again. I have decided that I am contributing MORE to society than someone sitting at a desk punching numbers all day. I am training up a child to be an upright citizen who can go out into the world and face the day to day challenges of life. I am training a little mind to get him ready to learn what he will need to do that. What I am doing is as important as that doctor, or lawyer, or even medical coder because one day they were one of those little minds that needed training.

I know this is not always an option. It wouldn't be in Courtney's case if I were not doing this. So if you are a Mom that has to work please don't think I think less of you. I know that is necessary sometimes. I am just saying if you do choose to stay at home with your children you should remember you are as valuable to society as the person who doesn't. As a matter of fact I would go so far as to say maybe more so then some. The training these little minds and hearts are getting right now will shape what kind of person they will be when they grow up and what more important job can you have.

Looking back I am sorry I didn't react differently to the situation. I should not have let it bother me as I did. It was just so new to me at the time. I might react differently now that I have had time to think about it. I should have told her "No I didn't have today off. My job is 24 hours a day. I don't get days off, I have to be on my toes all the time. You mean you actually get days off, WOW!" Of course I am being sarcastic but I think you get the message.

I know if I ever have the opportunity to join the workforce again I will react differently to women choosing to stay at home. I will applaud them and try to uplift them. I would never do anything that would make them feel less then the investor that they are. The entrepreneur might be investing money but they are investing lives and that is so valuable.